Viva El Peru (I don’t even know what that means.) Queso!

AMIGOS!

I went, I conquered, I returned with bruised toes. How to do Machu Picchu, 101.

Approximately 5 months ago I spastically booked a 4 day trek in Peru. It twas February. I was at work (oops) and had about 5 minutes before I had to run for the elevators to catch a train home to MI for the weekend when I took the Pay Pal deposit plunge.

You have to book a spot on the Inca Trail IN ADVANCE. Spots are limited and fill up extremely fast. As a result, the way I remember the moment of truth, when I actually laid down the cash to hold my place, was as it being an act completed purely out of nervousness that I wouldn’t have the option to book if I waited until the next day (I was right.)

A couple hours after the credit card charge I texted the boyfriend something along, “OH MY GOD, WE ACTUALLY HAVE TO GO TO PERU.” And so it began…

We booked a flight based on our trek schedule a few days later. A couple months lapsed and I remembered we needed a hostel for the nights we wouldn’t be in a tent. El Tuco ended up being our Cuzco hostel of choice, It was definitely the right one. I recommend.

The next thing we knew, the trip was upon us.

Gear was the first order of business, and where else would someone in the Chicagoland area go to get geared up for adventure than Uncle Dan’s. We hit up 2 of my stores in one day, Southport and Evanston, and with the guidance of our off the chain staff and management, we were prepared from apparel to eating utensils.

After a broken elbow and series of energy draining colds, frankly, I had no idea if I had the stamina to make it on the trail. But after shopping, dammit, I could look and talk the part like a pro.

We then got our shots and altitude meds (necessary, don’t try the trip without them) and I started practicing upping my water intake. I made copies of my passport, got our itinerary into reliable hands, and enjoyed the anticipation.

We left on June 10th.

You arrive to the city of Cuzco 2 days prior to the trek to get acclimated to the altitude.

I love Peruvians. I can’t think of a single sole that wasn’t exceptionally kind to us during our stay. Plus, they. like. to party. they like. they like to party.

Cuzco, Peru enjoys a full month of celebrations and parades during the month of June until June 24th, Solstice. It’s a tradition passed down from the Ketchwa culture, more commonly believed to be Incan. Shocking, I know.

What we believe to be an entire race of pepole, Inca, is actually only one person, the king. The story goes, when the Spanish invaded and the Ketchwan people kept telling them to see Inca, they mistook the name for the king as the culture itself. Today, most of us still think the ancient culture was “Incan.” It’s not. Stop kidding yourselves.

We spent our first day in Cuzco eating and sleeping (altitude adjustment). And woke up on day 2 refreshed. One of the best things about hostels are the people you meet, and meet we did. We spent a day with a couple from San Francisco who were heading to a well known market in an outside town, Pisac. The market was fantastic fun. We haggled, argued about leather hats, ate enormous corn kernels, and saw more products made out of Al Paka than I ever thought possible. In the afternoon we went to the Sacred Valley, ruins from the Ketchwan days. In the evening we ate pizza. It was a great day.

At 5 am the next morning, we headed for the Mountains.

If you want to do the 4 day Inca Trail trek you have to do it guided with a tour company. If you fall madly in love with my words today and find them haunting your dreams until you book this trek yourself, use Peru Treks! They are the best. They are one of the most affordable. They are the best.

The trek was awesome (ehem, Sometimes I wanted to die. What? No seriously.)

History lesson:

The Inca trail doesn’t need to take 4 days. There is a path for trading goods that is only a 6 hour hike from the start to Machu Picchu. But, the 4 day trail was the trail of choice for the Ketchwan people. Prior to arriving in Machu Picchu they needed to purify their conscience. Which you know, whatever, that’s awesome. So for 4 days, they purified, and hiked. So did we.

I couldn’t help but wonder along the way if the fact that I was in the back of the group struggling the most meant I was the one with the guiltiest conscience. Ponder…

I have never experienced views like I did on the Inca Trail.

Every time you pause, every time you look up, you’re stunned. One moment you’re staring down at a gorgeous river and valley and the next up at mountains capped with snow that you’ll never reach. One day you walk through “the forest of clouds” where you’re moving in and out of just that, the clouds; then through jungle like terrain and unbelievable forestry. Everything was beautiful.

Nothing seems unusual on the Inca Train, (including smelling really bad and being really dirty.) One day R and I made a turn and there on the trail was a Llama. Just straight chilling.

You also pass a lot of smaller ruins along the way. Spots that were used as places to sleep or lookouts for the trail. If you have a good guide, you get the chance to really learn a lot about the Ketchwan people on your way.

Unless you hire a porter, you carry your own bag on the trail. Normally, carrying your own stuff when you’re camping means lame meals and granola bars.

But on the Inca Trail there are 2 things nobody carries - your tent, and your food. Those are carried by your trek companies porters.

Everyday porters went rushing by us moving at 4x our speed with items as large as propane tanks on their back!! It’s WILD to see how well they navigate the trail. R asked our guide about the porters and why they wouldn’t leave up camp sites to save some weight. He told us part of the reason we travelled with so many porters and that we benefit from such incredible campsites, is for the cities job rate. The more extravagant our meals and our needs, the more people they are able to employ.

And it is so worth it!

The food was off the chain. Each meal was atleast 4 courses of deliciousness. Plus, several nights we were given various Peruvian brews as a night cap, all equally delicious and the perfect way to fall asleep. The meals never failed to amaze me and I constantly wondered if It were at all possible that I was burning enough calories hiking for it to mean anything with the amount I was consuming at each sitting.

We met the man behind the meals on our first night. Our guide brought our chef out to introduce him to us, before which he lit our flaming dessert on fire for presentation. “Anything can happen in the Andes.”

Nights are cold. From what I heard from my fellow trekkers, the rent-able sleeping bags didn’t seem to cut it. But I was equipped with a Lafuma Extreme90Pro, and I never complained of cold. I slept like an angel (as long as I didn’t have to go the bathroom which in the middle of the night in a tent is never inviting.) But be warned - several of the taller gentleman in our group had a hard time fitting in their tent, and those who were left without a Lafuma bag to keep out the cold didn’t feel so well rested. Also, If I did it again, I’d pack a version of an air mattress you blow up yourself. One couple had one and It looked way better than the bed roll Peru Treks provided, which may have been flatter than the ground, but I’m pretty sure it was just as hard.

In the morning the porters wake you up with a fresh cup of Coca tea to get you going. Boyfriend never drank his (loser) so I often got 2.

Don’t go on this trip if you’re not social or you’re hoping to find some solitude. You better be ready to bond with your group. You eat, sleep and sweat with the same people for 4 days. Our guide, Carlos, hilarious little man, constantly reminded us that we were a family. He was right. We had to be.

Our group was the bomb:

  • 5 Fire Fighters - intimidating I know.
  • 1 of their Girlfriends - who deserves much more mentioning that that as her energy and optimism was untouchable
  • 1 Mom - a constant reminder that the trek was hard, but completely completable
  • 1 Teacher - a constant reminder of the wonders travel can bring to your life and the devotion you can have to your work
  • 1 Canadian - had been traveling for months without allowing societal expectations or finances to hold her back
  • 2 Newlyeds - we had the pleasure of an awesome couple from London share their honeymoon with us, and give us the perspective on the royal wedding we didn’t know
  • And obviously myself and the boyfriend - Midwest, represent


Plus our 2 guides:

  • Carlos - a constant charismatic gem in our adventures
  • And his sidekick, Manuel - who Carlos often announced as, “The Metrosexual”


On the last day of the trek you wake up before 4 am and start the day trekking in the dark. You arrive to Machu Picchu as the sun comes up and all the clean perfumed tourists who took the train from the city begin to arrive. After all the spectacular views you experience along the way, I didn’t think getting to the actual ruins would be that neat. But to see an entire ancient city set high in the mountains delicately placed as if it would fall off into an abyss with one tectonic plate movement, is pretty darn incredible.

Everyone asks me about the physical requirements to make the Inca Trail trek. I never really had a problem with extreme mussel pains until the end of the trek. (And trust me I felt it at the end. Everyone did.) So it was never a lack of strength that held me back, it was my breathing. That altitude will get ya. You know that heaving, gasping for air thing that happens after rushing up steps or running too fast/far, that you try to subdue because you know everyone around you is like, “wow that person is out of breath.” I pretty much felt like that for 4 days. The hike isn’t a vacation, it’s a challenge.

But it’s the most beautiful and rewarding challenge you could dream!

When I finally showered after 4 days of nothing but baby wipes to cleanse my skin, it kinda hit me that the trip was over. I spent months anticipating and mentally prepping for that journey. Like ending a really good book, the completion was a bitter sweet feeling. I can’t wait to get into the next story, but I’m sad that such an exciting chapter had to end.

I went 7 days without Coffee in Peru.
I hated it,
- C